Back in town

In general, I had a really nice time in California visiting my friends.  In all honesty, even though I had such a rough time when I lived there in 2009-2010, I did not want to leave.  I forgot that I truly enjoy the pace of life there.  My friend that was kind enough to host me went through a difficult breakup this fall.  She also invited her friend from college to stay with us who is going through some very heavy personal stuff right now.  Basically, we were a slumber-party-support-group.

The weather was on the chilly side, but so sunny.  I ran every day and enjoyed the change in scenery, hitting up my old running paths and trying to let me soul rest for a bit.

I met up with several of my friends from work and graduate school, which was so great, overall, but also sad in the sense that I ended up talking about Pauline and Juan A LOT.

Ah, and speaking of which, Juan and I were in contact a bit and I was thinking he might drive down to see me.  He told me he really wanted to come but that it was a bad idea.  I know he's right.  It has been more than a year since we really broke up.  I sort of freaked out and cried a lot when I realized he was not going to come - mainly because I am really struggling with the notion of NEVER EVER seeing him again.  And the fact that he either does not really think of it like that, or he does not care/is ok with it.  I don't know.

One of the major highlights of the trip, however, was a great afternoon coffee date with my friend who hosted me, our friend from work, and our lovely Miranda!  I told my friends I was going to meet a girl whose blog I read.  I explained that it was basically like a diary where you get public commentary, but that the entire idea is that no one you know in real life reads it.  They seemed perfectly satisfied with that.  I did not tell them that I have a blog too.  Anyway, Miranda was so, so, so lovely and friendly (and skinny!) and we had a lovely time drinking tea and getting to know one another a bit.  Miss Miranda, I hope you had as good of a time as I did, and its good to know we're both nice, non-pyscho internet people in real life, right?

The only souvenir I brought back from San Diego was a few pounds around my middle.  I did not have access to a scale while I was there, and we ate out for nearly every meal.  I was pretty well behaved, honestly, sticking to salads and light fare, but I think the combination of more sodium than usual and not controlling the calories myself left me in bad shape.  I will not give an exact number, but even after taking a laxative tea last night (traveling and changing time zones and eating wheat all messed with my tummy a bit, so it was for good reason) I was over 140.  I was looking at an old photo of me from the summer of 2010 last night and I know I was about 8 pounds less then, I looked so much better.  I am resolved to do what I have to do to lose weight right now.  I have done it before, I know I can do it now.  Especially since I start school and my internship this week - the stress and busy schedule will leave me not eating much.  My clothes are not fitting right and I cannot take a photograph without feeling disgusting.  Plus, I want to show people my tattoo, but my gross middle is prohibiting me from being more comfortable with that.

Oh, and I am on day 17 of my running streak - it happens to be snowing/raining today, but I am not going to stay in and waste the day.

I know I have been totally out of it as of late, so I have only been reading and not really leaving any comments.  How is everyone doing?

Ruby, I want your address so I can send you a little something...

My final sunset in San Diego


Miranda said...

I too had a great time! Yes, it so turns out we are normal regular people in real life. It would be awesome if you moved back. It sounds like this trip was just what you needed to help you with the stuff going on in your life. As for the vacation weight gain. It sucks! It's so sad but I'm still hanging onto all but 1 lb gained from a vaca that was 3 mo ago! But that won't be you.

Peridot (G+P) said...

It's great that you had fun times to set beside the bad memories from living there.

*Massive hugs*

Just. . . fuck Juan, ugh. It seems to me that he's being a manipulative douchebag whether he means to or not.

Omg that is so cool! I dream of being able to meet some of you guys IRL but since I live on the bottom of the world it will probably never happen :( Lol, at least we know that 2 of you aren't creeps XD

I'm surviving. Had too much salt yesterday so I'm up nearly 1kg overnight. SO PISSED OFF!

Take care, love you to bits Dese <3

Louise said...

I love your blog, your style is really good.
Hope you're able to achieve your goals xx


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