Busy

Still hovering around 137.  Ridiculous.

Ran four miles Saturday, six on Sunday, and four more this morning.  I need to budget my time a bit better, get my bum out of bed before 7:30 and up my mileage.

I think only have breakfast, a snack, and coffee sounds like a great idea for today.  If I keep that up, I'll be 135 by the end of the week.

I have a ton of schoolwork to get done in the next few days (10-15 page SINGLE-SPACED report on health in Lebanon, biostatistics homework from three chapters, reading/study guides/quiz/case study for epidemiology) since I am going home on Saturday morning.  That also means, I need to run tomorrow afternoon, Thursday/Friday mornings, Sunday morning, and possibly Monday afternoon if I can squeeze it in.

I am so tired of being fat.

I cried most of the day on Saturday because I am so large. I cried in the shower yesterday as I grabbed the excess flesh on my stomach and thighs. I need to be under 120 pounds.  I keep saying it, but I'm not doing anything - which is extra pathetic, because this time last year, I was quickly creeping down to 128.

6 comments:

Miranda, AKA Fed Up said...

Don't get too discouraged. Be patient and you can get there. I envy your ability and desire to run.

A Quiet Battle said...

I'm sorry you're feeling down. It's hard not to sometimes with this damn disorder. I second, Miranda, though...your running is so inspirational. Makes me feel like a lazy arse. : )

Dani said...

sorry hunny i know how hard it is to live this way
wow thats alot of school work ew

Cierra said...

God I hate that seemingly stupid shit like this makes us just break down in tears. Last week in my car on the way to the gym for my morning work (5:30am!) I just started crying and whispering "why do I have to keep doing this?" It just sucks. Try to make it through, love.

bambi phaedra athena said...

school sucks :(

but running is good :)

one of the cross-country coaches had to say her goodbyes today, and she said something I really liked, and will hopefully help you, "You're given a lot of opportunities in life to be negative. I want you girls to promise me to pull through and be positive. It's an easy thing to act negative, but positivity will pay off in the end. There is a lot of work to be done, and the seasons are tough (cross country and track season) but I want you girls to know that you can work hard but laugh, have fun, and be happy."

Does It Even Matter said...

JESUS - I wish I could run like that.....Jealous!!

Don't get discourage. With as much hard work you put in you will loose. :)

Schools a bitch....and yikes that paper. Good luck I know you can get thru it!!

 

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